There is the joke about the efficiency expert who concluded his lecture to a group of business leaders with a note of caution: “You need to be careful about trying these techniques out at home.”
“Why?” asked a man in the audience.
“Well,” the expert explained, “I watched my wife’s routine at dinner for years. She made lots of trips between the refrigerator, stove, table, and cabinets, often carrying a single item at a time. One day I told her, ‘You’re wasting too much time. Why don’t you try carrying several things at once?”
“Did it save time?” the guy in the audience asked.
“Actually, yes,” replied the expert. “It used to take her twenty minutes to make dinner. Now I do it in ten.”
How many of us can relate? There certainly have been times where my being smart, but not very wise, got me into trouble!
What is Wisdom?
The efficiency expert in the joke above is smart and knowledgeable but lacking the wisdom to recognize and appreciate that his wife is making him dinner. Or that her approach to things might be different than his. Intelligence and knowledge alone do not make a person wise. But what is wisdom? Wisdom is defined in the dictionary as “the quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgment”.
It seems like in today’s society, many high-profile figures and leaders seem to have a lack of wisdom. At times, valuing the opposite of being seen as ‘wise’. There was a great article in the Globe & Mail last May exploring how wisdom is making a comeback in some realms. While initially difficult to put a finger on, the characteristics of someone who is ‘wise’ are remarkably consistent across the generations and around the world, including some of the following:
· They are self-aware and have the ability to see past self-interest. There is an air of humility about them.
· They are less reactive, even spacious, and have the ability to pause and consciously choose how they respond in a given situation.
· They are more open-minded and have more perspective, born out of their experience.
· They promote the common good above self-interests.
· They have more than just knowledge or intelligence. They seem to understand what matters most in varying situations and are able to combine knowledge, empathy and pragmatic action in a balanced, integrated and often nuanced way that works. Wisdom is often seen as the ability to integrate and balance a number of perspectives.
· They act wisely. It is more than just having wise thoughts, they demonstrate their wisdom through wise decisions and actions.
In some ways, you could say they represent people at their best.
Why I Believe Wisdom Matters Today
In many ways, wisdom matters today for the same reasons it mattered in the past. Wisdom is good for both the individual and the community. Few of us would say “we need less wisdom in the world.” Families, communities and societies are more likely to thrive in the long term if they value wisdom and strive to take wise action.
In a world of increasingly polarized views on almost any topic, there is definitely room to bring more nuance, empathy and wisdom to the table.
Further, each of us face challenges in our work, personal and citizen lives that are more complex than ever. While some leaders will claim the issues we face are simple black and white choices (think Brexit, as a simple stay or go vote), the world is more connected, more diverse and more complex than ever. Distilling issues down to black or white, yes or no tends to only create camps of us and them, losing sight of the greater “us. We look to our leaders for wisdom and often we come up wanting. So, we start with ourselves.
What Can You Do?
1. Seek out and spend time with people who are wise. Actively seek out mentors who have more knowledge and experience than you. Discuss complex matters with those who you deem are actually wise. Indigenous cultures prize their elders and the younger generations seek out their time to learn from them. Be choosey about who you follow, watch and read – are they people who embody wisdom?
2. Manage your own mental/emotional state. As a parent, it has become obvious to me that accessing wisdom when I’m frustrated or overwhelmed is like trying to uncork the wine without a corkscrew. I know what I want but I don’t have the tool to get at it. Start by becoming aware of your mental/emotional state. Pause and take several slow, conscious breaths – thereby starting to shift your nervous system out of fight or flight. Then see if you can shift your state to one that is more open-minded. See if you can find empathy or common interests with others (we almost always share more than we realize). Only from a calmer more connected brain will you be able to access your wisdom.
3. Practice openness. Openness provides space for other perspectives to be considered. Be curious and challenge your fixed assumptions. Have some humility and let go of your ego and need to be right.
4. Act wisely. It is more than just being intelligent and playing with different ideas. It is exercising your judgment ‘muscles’ and then acting wisely.
5. Practice. Like everything else, this takes intention and practice. From my own experience, it is certainly easy to be un-wise. In fact, writing this article has been a very humbling experience, given the number of times each day that it could easily be argued I’m not being particularly wise! But like other character traits I value, wisdom can be learned and practiced. So, I work at it.
The dogmas of the quiet past are inadequate to the stormy present.
~ Abraham Lincoln
Conclusion
Wisdom is one of those character traits which showcases humans at their best. It never goes out of style and will always be relevant, perhaps today more than ever.
Wisdom does not come from knowledge and intelligence alone. It includes learning from our experiences and developing good judgment. It also includes practice and making it something you are aiming to have more of. So, what is a challenge you are facing where some wisdom would help? As you pause and reflect on it, what possibilities exist that you might not have initially considered? And as you weigh those, what would the wiser choice be for you?
Thank you for taking the time to read this post. Please feel free to share your comments.
I coach amazing people like you to delete the overwhelm, discern what matters most and drive your future. Schedule a FREE consultation with me HERE if you want to explore what life would be like for you with a more resilient brain and more masterful habits.