Tired of Working Hard at Being Resilient? Try Finding Strength Through Lightness Instead

I don’t know about you, but at times I can tire of working at being more resilient.   And I’m one of the guys who is all about helping people be more resilient!

Resilience is definitely an important character attribute for all of us, particularly in our current times.  But there is more than one way to build it and right now, what we may just need is a little more lightness and focus on happiness, laughter and joy.  

So, let me start you off with a joke to lighten your day.

Your Joke of The Day

After his theory of relativity made him world famous, Albert Einstein was in demand as a speaker at universities around the country. Einstein didn’t drive, so he depended on his chauffeur to take him to these speaking engagements. After one lecture, the chauffeur – who bore a striking physical resemblance to Einstein– commented, ‘I’ve heard your lecture so many times, Prof. Einstein, I could probably deliver it for you!”

“Really?” laughed Einstein. “Well, we’re going to Yale next week. Let’s do it there.”

Sure enough, the chauffeur delivered a perfect rendition of Einstein’s standard lecture, while Einstein gleefully sat in the back of the room wearing his chauffeur’s uniform. But just as the driver was leaving the podium, a particularly snotty graduate student stood up and asked a complicated question about antimatter formation, hoping to trip up the great scientist. Without missing a beat, the chauffeur replied, “Sir, the answer to the question is simple– so simple, in fact that I will let my chauffeur answer it for me.”1

Hopefully that brought a smile to your face, or maybe even a chuckle.

But here’s the question: how do you feel now?  

If today has been a busy or stressful day, I’m guessing you feel a little lighter.  With a smile on your face, the world will look a little brighter for a moment.  Or perhaps the path forward looks less challenging than it did minutes ago?

Why Humour works

When we are stressed, our body releases cortisol and adrenaline, which narrows our focus and clouds our thinking.  As we use lightness to shift out of that stress response, we experience a momentary reprieve, allowing our thinking to broaden.  Options we hadn’t thought of before start to appear.  Things don’t appear so serious. 

And that’s not all - that lightness will also make you more engaging and charismatic.  You will be more confident in your work and do better work.  Heck, the science says that people will even find you more attractive! 

That’s the power of finding a little lightness, a smile and some joy in your day.  Without using the word ‘resilient’ or talking about Navy SEAL toughness, you are in fact stronger and more able to get through the challenges you face.

So, how do you find more lightness and happiness in your day?

Five Simple Ways to Find More Happiness in Your Day

1.     Praise someone.  This may sound backwards at first, isn’t this supposed to be about you?  Yes, and one of the surest ways to pop you out of your internal focus on your troubles is to pause, look around, notice and appreciate someone doing something amazing - and then praise them.  Their appreciation for your thanks will make you feel as good as they do for receiving the praise.  

2.     Stop ‘adulting’ for a minute.  Think back to something that brought you joy as a kid.  Or maybe something frivolous and fun you did in your 20’s.  Give yourself permission to stop being such a responsible adult for a few minutes.  Yes, there are clients and teams and families to tend to.  But they need you to be a little lighter and more joyful to really be of service to them. 

3.     Connect with an old friend who makes you laugh.  We all have those people in our lives – the ones who seem to come by this naturally.  Remember how you feel after talking to them?  If you haven’t connected with them for too long, reach out and say hello and enjoy the smile they bring you.  

4.     Listen to comedy.  One of my favourite ways to find a smile is the CBC’s program “The Debaters”.  There is absolutely nothing serious or important about this show, and that’s what make it perfect.  Nonsensical debates like “Moose vs Beaver” or “Pencil vs Pen”.  But in the hands of clever comedians it becomes pure genius and completely changes my mood.

5.     Cross something off your to-do list.  Wait a minute, this sounds like work!?  That’s the thing, you can find happiness in surprising places.  If you are feeling lighter from taking a moment to do one of the above, try this to keep it going: complete a small task that has been gnawing at you.  Particularly something that irks you, such as an area that needs to be tidied up. We get a hit of dopamine and feel good when we complete a task.  That feeling is often sustained as you re-appreciate the results.  Make the first step small, bite-sized and achievable to get you started and then just get going on it.

There are countless other ways to do this and you likely have your own good ideas.   The main thing is to bring some intention to find or create a bit more joy or lightness in your day.

 

“Life is far too important a thing ever to talk seriously about.”

Oscar Wilde

 

Conclusion

Most of us still aren’t feeling like our usual selves.  And that’s fair enough - these continue to be strange and different times.  And there are some very important issues we need to take a stand on.  But that doesn’t mean there isn’t room for lightness along the way.  Like Einstein’s chauffeur in the joke, when our mind is in that lighter space, we are far more able to think on our feet, be more creative and see our way through tricky situations.

Do your brain a favour and find a way to smile more often this week.  Be intentional about finding happiness each day and you will be surprised at what you find.  You and everyone around you will thank you for it!

Thank you for taking the time to read this post.  Please share your comments or observations, as we all learn from each other. 

And if you want to see how you are doing – take this 2-minute “Where is Your Head At?” self-assessment.  

I train CPAs how to delete the overwhelm, discern what matters most, and drive their future.  If you want to level up your resilience and happiness to better manage through tough times, please visit www.mindfulwisdom.ca to learn more.

1.     Taken from Life is a Joke.  100 Life Lesson (with punch lines), by The Javna Brothers.